Cassandra in Reverse by Holly Smale

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Cassandra is definitely NOT having a good day. She’s been broken up with by her boyfriend of 4 months, she’s being fired by her boss, and they actually don’t even have banana muffins at her favorite pit stop. How can they be out of banana muffins??? When she learns suddenly on this day that she has the gift of time travel, she wonders, maybe, can she reverse some of these things that have happened? More importantly, can she reverse the bigger things that have affected her life? As she learns about how this new “gift” actually works, she also learns quite a bit about herself.

No one can describe what it’s like to be inside the mind/body of an autistic individual as one who is autistic – and this autistic author gives us the gift of sharing that experience by creating a brilliant, sarcastic, awkward, and deeply lovable autistic character in Cassandra. We feel for her as she struggles with her social interactions and we cringe on her behalf as she is challenged with various overwhelming noises, textures, and changes in her routine. She tries to learn from her prior experiences and she tries to “undo” – as we all wish we could, at times. And her journey is as entertaining as it is endearing. What she learns to appreciate is that she has to be true to herself and treasure who she is and the good she alone can bring to the world.

And don’t we all have this to learn? While we’d all like to change certain parts of ourselves, it may be more valuable to appreciate what we can do instead of trying to change what we cannot.

 

The Secret Chord by Geraldine Brooks

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Taken by brute force after the slaughter of his family, Natan, a young boy of ten years, unwittingly reveals his gift as a prophet of the Name. Recognizing his value, David, the leader of the rebel forces being hunted by King Shaul, brings Natan into the fold and keeps him forever by his side as trusted advisor and friend. And it is Natan who narrates this story of David, as he witnesses David gathering strength, power and ultimately the throne over the motley tribes of Israel, revealing David’s wisdom and his failings, his humanity and his vulnerability.

This fictionized version of history is as poetic as it is violent, with scenes of love and of war, scenes of fanfare and of mutiny. The writing is beautiful, with imagery that builds the story in the mind’s eye with crystal clarity. We are given a window into the character of David himself and it is multi-layered and complex. David is a leader, as we all know – but he is deeply flawed, human. He is charismatic, brilliant, musically gifted, and sensitive, and yet his vanity, violence, and blind spots for certain people in his life create his vulnerabilities. Natan becomes his conscience, his guide, and often the only one who will speak truth to him, even as he fears the possible repercussions of his words.

Yet another excellent novel by Geraldine Brooks – though not for the feint of heart. She brings these biblical characters to life and we come to feel what life might have been like at that time for the unstable royalty that was so short-lived in that land.

Vera Wong’s Unsolicited Advice for Murderers by Jesse Q Sutanto

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Most days, Vera begins her routine with a very early morning walk, multiple, prodding texts to her son, and service to her most loyal – and singular – customer at her “World Famous” tea house. Most surprisingly, however, today Vera stumbles upon the body of a dead man right there on the floor of her shop. What no one suspects, however, is how very efficiently Vera can solve the mystery of who killed this man- because truly, what do the police know, anyway??? Very quickly, Vera finds herself embedded in the life of this man, connected to those around him, as she finds a way to the truth.

If you’ve ever had a mother – and I suspect many of you have -you will relate to Vera’s delightfully pushy, guilt-inducing, and extraordinarily generous character that is the driver of this novel. She is a force to be reckoned with, a woman on a mission, a person to whom no one can say no. And since she observes that each of the other characters is struggling in their own way, she cares for them in her very maternal manner — even as she is accusing each of them of being a suspect of the dead man’s murder! There is such lovely irony you cannot help smiling throughout the entirety of the book.

Is this story a little contrived? Yes. Is it too perfectly wrapped up, as I complain about often? Of course it is. But I am still going to rate it as a MUST READ, because right now, in this dark moment, we all need a book like this one – one that is pure entertainment, about warmth, and about love.

 

 

In the Dream House by Carmen Maria Machado

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In this memoir, Machado shares her experience of a relationship with a beautiful woman that begins as dream-like and erotic and devolves into terrifying and abusive. Through a course of poetic essays, with the Dream House imagery as theme, she portrays how she is entranced, then entrapped, and then, finally, enraged enough to free herself from the woman who has gripped her heart and fractured it in two.

This is, apparently, one of the rare portrayals of queer relationship violence/abuse that is documented by literary means. While books about heterosexual abuse abound, the queer community has been more silent on this topic. It is not uncommon for a marginalized community to feel a loyalty such as this, to hold itself to a higher standard, to try to appear to have achieved a higher ideal. Doing so is an understandable way to try to protect those in the community from further criticism, because, surely, they receive enough as it is. However, by doing so, it denies those who identify as queer as having others believe them , understand their plight, and have others who openly support and identify with them when it does occur. And spousal abuse/relationship abuse can happen to anyone – anyone is vulnerable, no matter your gender identity, your sexual preference, your race, your religion, your ability, your size. This is the harsh reality.

The writing here is poetic and ethereal. The image of the Dream House as both positive and negative images captures the internal struggle of the victim of abuse and the subsequent gaslighting. There can be so much wonder and love and light, but there is also so much darkness and hatred and doom – and it can change in a heartbeat from one extreme to the other. The victim walks on eggshells, constantly apologizing for her own existence. She feels she must have brought this on herself, she must deserve what is happening, because, really, what else could it be? How could someone love her so much in one moment but then hate her so much in another? Maybe if she just acts better, IS better, she can make it right. But of course, it is not her – it is her abuser who is at fault. This is so painfully hard to see when you are in it.

Machado has very generously opened her heart to us. I hope that others come forward with their stories as well in order to create the supportive community that is necessary to acknowledge that this can happen to anyone, queer or otherwise.

 

 

The Last Thing He Told Me by Laura Dave

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Although she did not grow up in a traditional family, Hannah has found herself now with a dream husband, Owen, and his teenage daughter, Bailey, and she’s moved quite happily into their home, into their lives. While she is still working on gaining Bailey’s “approval,” she is very much in love with Owen, and appreciates the love, the independence, and the respect he shows her. Which is why she is stunned when one day, he suddenly disappears, leaving her with a note saying only 2 words: Protect her. It is clear to Hannah who Owen means, but it is not at all clear why or how she must accomplish this.

This is definitely a fun read – full of suspense, sharp characters, and a twisty plot that kept me guessing and those pages turning throughout the book. I also had an opportunity to learn a bit. I never knew the term “woodturning” – which was the trade of the main character, Hannah. Having looked it up, I realize that we’ve all probably purchased items produced by these craftspeople but looking into how it works, the use of the lathe, and the techniques involved, it is quite impressive.

On the other hand, I felt the plot was a bit easy. The search for Owen, truly finding a needle in a haystack, sort of fell into the laps of Hannah and Bailey in some ways. As they followed remote memories of Bailey’s, that may or may not have been valid, they were lucky enough to have stumbled just upon the correct direction enough times that it worked. But I suppose that is why this is fiction, right?

On the whole, it’s a worthwhile read, a much-needed distraction in this very tense moment in our world, and I say, go for it!

 

 

The Glass Hotel by Emily St. John Mandel

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Paul has felt lost since the loss of his parents, which has sent him back to his half-sister, Vincent, who apparently feels equally lost. They have never been close, and this attempt to reconnect – or really just Paul’s attempt to find a place to temporarily land – is clearly failing as well. It seems they are just too deep into their own suffering, dealing with their own traumas and mistakes. But at some point, they both find themselves working temporarily in the same hotel on a tiny island off of Vancouver where an incident there launches the two of them into very different and strange directions, from the eye of a scandalous hurricane.

While this book begins with an eerie, atmospheric tone, where it is hard to distinguish the fog of the tiny island setting from that inside Paul’s brain, it gradually moves into more vivid imagery as the setting moves to more urban locations. Further, as the story expands to include more characters, we begin to hear the story from the perspective of those other characters, hearing their voices as they hear them, and seeing their visions as they see them. This is an unusual and effective means of keeping the reader so engaged in the story that we are actually blindsided to the scale of the underlying scandal and subplot when it actually comes to light.

I think what rings out here is the theme of honesty/dishonesty – with oneself and with others. A character is asked at one point if one can know something and not know something at the same time. I say no, not if one is being honest. One can know something and deny it, sublimate it, cover it up, even possibly forget it – but once someone knows something, one cannot honestly un-know something. The most honest character here is Vincent, who is true to herself in many ways. She does know, for example, that the relationship she becomes involved with – with a much older and very wealthy man – is transactional and that she’s entered the “kingdom of money” as she refers to it. She knows she is acting, that it is temporary, that it is not real. She wears a wedding ring, but they are not married – a symbol of their fakeness. Even the best friend she acquires during this time becomes someone who ultimately sees her as invisible.

I would definitely recommend this read – there are so many layers to this story and it is engaging to the end. The characters are steeped in their own psychological battles, while the plot circles around them like a tornado pulling them all into one communal disaster. While you can see it coming, you still can’t bear to look away.

The Rest of Her Life by Laura Moriarty

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Leigh has grappled with her relationship with her daughter Kara for some time now. It feels so much simpler with her younger son, but somehow with Kara, everything she says is wrong, everything she does only increases the tension between them. Now, suddenly, their lives are thrown into chaos when Kara has a horrific accident and needs her mother to be there for her. As Leigh struggles to rectify her issues with her own mother, she finds a path to being the mother she strives to be.

[Full disclosure: I have to admit that I downloaded this book, thinking it was by Liane Moriarty instead of Laura Moriarty. Ha! But in spite of that, it was still a worthwhile read and I plowed through it nonetheless. :)]

While I found this book held my attention and provided the distraction a worthy novel should, I kept feeling like something huge was about to happen that never quite materialized. There were, of course, moments that were significant – but they were subtle and not as dramatic as the story called for, in my opinion. Leigh, for example, had an extraordinarily traumatic upbringing by a mother who was shockingly neglectful. She clearly harbored well-deserved resentment and anger and, of course, like most women, was socialized to repress it. Her sister, for example, found excuse after excuse for their mother, and it did not serve her well. And while Leigh tried so hard – maybe too hard – to be a good mom to Kara, she was unable to connect with her on a basic level, most likely because she had no example to follow. When she did have her “aha” moment, it was so under the radar that I almost missed it. And it was too important not to notice.

So I do recommend this novel, but I also recommend that you pay attention. There are important messages here, but you could miss them if you’re not watching carefully.

 

 

City of Girls by Elizabeth Gilbert

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Vivian was never exactly interested in following in the path her nuclear family had laid out for her: school, perhaps a temporary job before she settled down to a marriage, and of course motherhood, thereby maintaining the social status comparable to that which she was born into, in her upstate NY, 1940’s, upscale community. So, when, at the age of 19, she failed out of Vassar after essentially never having attended any classes — clearly flouting this path — she was shipped down to Manhattan to live with her equally unconventional Aunt Peg. Here in the heart of the theater district (well, almost), Vivian found her freedom – the ability to explore the city, the ability to express herself in ways she could never have imagined, and also the ability to make mistakes she would gradually learn and grow from.

This novel is just as entertaining as the theater world itself, opening the curtain to both the comedy and tragedy of NYC in wartime 1940’s, the challenges of managing a theater production with all its moving parts, and underneath, the struggle of a young girl finding out who she really is in the midst of all this frenetic drama. As Vivian falls in love with the city and with her newfound theater family, we find ourselves falling in love with each of the characters. Vivian’s Aunt Peg, with all her vulnerabilities, is as generous and forgiving as anyone might be and teaches us the beauty of living in this way. Her “secretary,” Olive, a no-nonsense, teetotaler, who never hesitates to remind everyone how little money they all have, demonstrates loyalty in the most understated and compassionate ways. Peg and Olive become both the liberators and the anchors for Vivian.

The voice of the narration is also quite clever. The story is told by Vivian to Angela, and we only discover late in the game who Angela actually is. We hear her name periodically as the story unfolds, and this reminds us that we are being told a story from Vivian’s perspective to someone in particular with a particular goal. It is a confession of sorts, but without the remorse or regret a confession has because there is no sin, no misdeed. It is just an honest telling. And we love Vivian for her living her life without apology and without regret, as she has lived, for most of her life, an honest life.

This is a beautiful book of historical fiction – highly recommend this!

Happiness Falls by Angie Kim

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“We didn’t call the police right away” laments Mia as she begins to unravel the tale of what happens after her autistic, non-speaking younger brother Eugene, returns from his therapeutic exercise in the park without their father. Eugene is clearly traumatized by what has happened in the park, as demonstrated by his persistent jumping to calm himself for hours and hours, but the family is unable to assess from him what exactly has occurred. As the family searches for their father/husband, in what becomes a missing person mystery, they also learn more about both him and about Eugene – and while the lessons become harder and harder, they also bring the family closer and closer.

As Mia reflects on her search for her father and the family’s approach to figuring out what might have occurred between Eugene and him in the park, Mia realizes that she has been self-absorbed, as a 20 year-old college student might be, as well as biased, as any of us might be.  As she learns more about her father and what he’s been analyzing during his time as a stay-at-home dad, she cycles through various reactions. Similarly, as it slowly dawns on her that her brother Eugene, is capable of much deeper thought than she’d previously understood, she has a mixture of emotions as well. Because her brother is right in front of her, this becomes a crucial part of the story.  Not only does she realize that one’s ability to speak may not be reflective of their verbal skills (they may just not have the ability to actually  vocalize their internal dialogue), but moreover, that one’s verbal skills are not the full picture of one’s overall intelligence, as she’d presumed. 

I certainly appreciated this book for opening my eyes to the possible deeper intelligence of those I may have judged erroneously as having less intelligence just because of their challenges with communication. Whether it is a language barrier because of a foreign nationality, a look that is different from our own, or behaviors/movements that do not match those we may associate with “normal” (whatever that might mean). we presume, judge, and miscalculate others’ abilities based on biases about which we are not even conscious. These feed into our understanding of those around us and we may be dismissive — even rude —  without even realizing we are being so. It is so important that we open our minds and our hearts to these possibilities, because only then can we become aware and hopefully prevent these insults, offenses to others. And in this moment of polarization, the more we can come together, the better.

And not to worry – there is of course also a story here, with a plot, characters, and suspense. It is not preachy, nor bogged down in too much detail. We do empathize with Mia as she parses out her discoveries. and we also develop a strong attachment for Eugene as we discover his personality, his humor. There is warmth without the saccharine. 

A definitely recommended read!  

 

 

The Wife by Alafair Burke

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Angela is caught off-guard when she learns her husband is accused of inappropriate sexual behavior by a student intern in his office. She has feared being in the spotlight because of a traumatic past that she’s worked hard to keep private, but as his profile has become more public, with the publishing of a bestseller and a popular podcast, he is, as she’d predicted, now vulnerable to this kind of negative attention as well. When a second woman steps forward with a new accusation, their world turns completely upside-down and Angela is not sure whom she can trust. How well does she really know her own husband?

This is a twisty whodunnit that is engaging right from the very first page. Even when I was feeling a bit cocky for having guessed some of the plot, there were continued turns and surprises that continued to catch me off my own guard and kept my amusement until the very last page. There are definitely many dark moments, so it’s not a “fun” book per se, but it is a story told with both wit and intelligence. We feel for the characters, although we may not exactly love them, and we see the story from various angles.

I believe my favorite character is the detective investigating the case, Corrine. She is kind, but she is also not to be deterred, ever. She remembers everything and she is no fool. She works overtime, pursues this case because she has a gut feeling and she just wants to see that justice is served.

This was a great book to read right now. While keeping up on the news is crucial right now, it is also important to practice self-care and distraction can be part of that. Reading is a vital part of my self-care… I highly recommend it!