#womensrights – kindread spirits

Ellie, aged 7, has just lost her father and feels as if her whole world has changed. She and her mother can no longer stay in their enormous home in the center of Tehran and must move to the “down” side of town. Nevertheless, while her mother is distraught over this and worries about their place in society, Ellie is actually excited to see children playing in the street, thrilled at the possibility of learning to play hopscotch, and dreams of meeting her ideal, best friend. When she walks in on the first day of her new school and is greeted by a spunky girl with dark, curly hair who shocks her with her outgoing nature, she thinks that this is not who she imagines will be her best friend. Ellie learns quickly that Homa, this warm, bright, honest, and fiercely loyal girl might just be that very friend.

This is a beautiful story of friendship, hardship, and loyalty. The two unlikely friends, Ellie and Homa, are as different as two girls might be – but perhaps it is because of this that they are amused by each other and get along. Ellie, self-aware in her materialism and superficiality, is nevertheless caught up in their friendship and feels a bond with Homa in spite of her absence of passion for the politics of the day. Nevertheless, she admires Homa – and is worried for her – for her passion and strength in seeking to promote human rights, particularly women’s rights. This is at the heart of both their friendship and their schism.

I actually love the way Ellie portrays herself as superficial, wanting what many want, and being self-aware about it. She is terrified of having to go back to being dependent on someone to pay her bills, to live in squalor, to have to need/want. She fears poverty, lack of power. And she admits to being afraid of being imprisoned, as we all are, at heart. So many novels are written with the main character as the brave one, the fighter, the hero. I love that in this one, the main character is the one who is the worrier, the caregiver, the friend. She is the one who has faults, is honorable, honest, and self aware, but who is supportive and can be helpful when the time is right. While many are brave and undertake righteous causes, fighting for freedom against oppressive and suppressive governments (such as that of the Shah’s and later that of the Ayatollah’s), not everyone is meant for that. I think that by creating an admirable, honorable, human and faulty main character for this tale, we can perhaps see ourselves identifying with that fear and relate to those that can help, those who support the heroes, the fighters.

This also gives a background to the story of the women of Iran. It is not only a historical context but a warning to all of us. It happened in Iran with extremists who toppled a democratically elected government, violently forcing themselves into power and overturning years of fighting for women’s rights in just moments. We in the US think we are so safe from this, but here we are, already fighting for power to make medical decisions over our own bodies. It starts there. Where will it end? If it happened in Iran, it can happen here as well.

I think this is an important read for not only women but men everywhere, and particularly here in the US and particularly now in this uncertain moment. We are experiencing no less than an undoing of our democracy in small (and not-so-small) steps. We need to pay attention and learn from other countries and other individuals’ experiences. Or there may be no where else to go…

Molly is smart and she is tough. She knows she’s different from those around her but she truly doesn’t care. While her mother, Carrie, and her best friend, Leroy, try in their own ways to convince her to bend to what is “acceptable,” especially when it comes to both gender and sexual stereotyped norms, she remains true to herself. And this is no simple task, not in the early 1950’s and not in rural Pennsylvania, nor on the Florida coast. It is clear to Molly that she must make it out of her small town to survive, but how she accomplishes this and what she finds when she gets there shows that life can be challenging wherever we may find ourselves.

This was a groundbreaking book in 1973, but of course it was initially ignored and kept underground because of its unabashed celebration of lesbian sex. Only a few years later, when a more established publisher took on the title did the book become more widely sold and gain something of its current notoriety. Now, of course, there are many books about this topic and it is less of a standout, but it must be acknowledged for its pioneering spirit and daring language. Few ventured into this terrain at the time; few were brave enough to “out” themselves when it was not only not fashionable but it could actually be quite dangerous to do so. But doing so clearly spoke to millions of folks who either identified with the characters or felt they needed to learn more. Doing so opened up a world of dialogue about the topic, freeing many to speak their truth and to acknowledge what might be in their hearts.

That said, the story itself is quite depressing. It feels as if there is a constant tugging at the heart, a constant thrum of defeat. Molly has high hopes, high expectations of herself and while she works hard and keeps herself focused on her goals, she has one obstacle thrown at her after another. Whether her family, her friends, her lovers, or her so-called mentors, everyone seems to disappoint. However realistic it is, in her world at that time, it is a hard story to take in. No matter her incredible achievements, she lived in a world where men ruled unchecked and women had no legal protections.

This novel functions as a crucial reminder of some rights we take for granted – and some that we should be continuing to fight for.